


today and the last time that I saw you

by thismagichour



Series: Sometimes I Still Feel The Bruise: critrole rsweek 2018 [1]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-18
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-05-24 21:26:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14962463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thismagichour/pseuds/thismagichour
Summary: A brief exploration of Taryon's side of the whole sad affair. For the prompt Vex & Tary for critrole rsweek"Taryon's back in Whitestone having a fucking ball.""No, Taryon's on the floor, weeping, holding his necklace."





	today and the last time that I saw you

**Author's Note:**

> My first fic of critrole rsweek! This starts during the events of the Vecna arc and goes past the end of the campaign, so massive spoilers for the Vox Machina campaign. Title is from William Fitzsimmon's "If You Would Come Back Home."

Taryon hasn’t even left Whitestone when his necklace starts pounding. He grabs at it, alarmed, waiting, knowing that Pike will save whoever it is soon. He clutches the pendant so tightly that he starts to imagine that it starts beating harder. He waits. He begins to worry, just a little. Maybe they needed him. Maybe they really needed him and he had let them leave him behind. Which of them went down, he wonders. It’s impossible to know. He desperately, selfishly, prays that it isn’t Vex or Percival. His vision blurs, and he realizes that he’s weeping. He kneels, powerless, in his room (it isn’t his room anymore, he’s leaving to go back home now, nothing of Vex’s is his anymore), hoping against hope that his friends are alright.

“Tary?” Doty says.

“It’s fine, Doty,” Tary says, thickly, “everything’s going to be fine, fine, fine.”

When the necklace stops pulsing, he’s relieved. He laughs a bit to himself, in fact, because there’s no reason to worry about Vox Machina. Not even death can stop them for long. What is there to worry about? It’s not until much later that he finds out the necklace stopped pulsing because there was no body left for it to register the loss.

 

When the word reaches him about Vox Machina, heroes of Tal’Dorei, overthrowing Vecna, Tary doesn’t even have time to feel triumphant, because the news of the death of the Raven Queen’s Champion follows quickly on its heels. He needs to be with Vex, immediately. With how slowly news travels to Deastok, she probably needed him a month ago. He leaves his mother in charge of Lionel and the rest of his team, only for a bit, because Vex is his family, and she needs him more than ever right now.

On the road, Taryon begins to wonder if Vex wants him there at all. They all have much faster ways of communicating than he does. They have much faster ways of traveling. If they wanted him there, wouldn’t he have heard it from them already? But it’s too late, anyway. He’s already more than halfway to Whitestone when the thought occurs to him. If they’d rather be alone, they can just teleport him through a tree when he gets there.

When he arrives on Vex’s doorstep, he is woefully unkempt. He has pressed himself rather harder than he would normally in traveling, and Doty hasn’t brushed his hair half as much as usual on the road. He takes a moment to steel himself, to make sure Doty isn’t writing any of this down, when he knocks. Vex, when she opens the door, gasps.

“Tary! Hello, darling.”

“Little Elf Girl,” Taryon says, all thoughts of his appearance forgotten, “I came as soon as I heard.”

“Oh,” Vex says. There is a moment where they simply look at each other, even the few months apart spanning between them like an ocean. Tary doesn’t know how to even begin to understand the depth of her loss. While he stares at her helplessly, she throws herself into his arms.

“I’m sorry, L.E.G,” Tary says, into her hair, “I’m so sorry.”

“Tary,” Vex gasps, her breaths shuddering, “I thought you’d never come.”

“Vex’ahlia, who’s at the-” Percy says as he comes into the foyer, “Taryon!”

“Hello, Percival,” Taryon says over Vex’s head.

“Tary came when he heard about… Vax,” Vex says, pulling away from him. She wipes her eyes with her fingers, and smiles.

“I understand if you want to be alone,” Tary says.

“Nonsense, darling, you’re family,” Vex says, and her smiles fades after she says it. She purses her lips, eyes wet, but Percy is already behind her, touching her shoulders gently.

“We’re very happy to have you, Tary,” Percy says softly. “Thank you for coming.”

“There’s no place I’d rather be,” Tary says.

“Come on then, darling, we still have your room made up for you,” Vex says, reaching for him. Tary blinks furiously. He is quite touched by the gesture, but now isn’t the time for it.

“Vex, darling, why don’t you let the kitchen know we have another guest, I’ll bring Tary to his room,” Percy says.

“You have staff now?” Tary says, mock outraged. “Are you finally living up to the standards to which we are accustomed?”

“Cassandra insisted that if I wasn’t staying at the castle, I should at least get staff,” Percy says.

“Not that it was much of a hardship,” Vex says, heading in the direction of the kitchen. Both men wait in silence as she leaves, smiles fading.

“How is she?” Tary says once she’s left, “And how are you?”

“I’m fine, Tary. I’m coping. So is Vex.” Percy says, gently. “It’s been…difficult.” Percy gestures in the direction of Tary’s old room, and Tary follows. Everything looks as it always has, and it is so easy to believe that nothing has changed. Of course, everything has changed, including Tary. The world itself feels colder now.

“I’m sorry for your loss, Percival,” Tary says. “I’m sure you’re sick of hearing that by now.”

“I’m sorry for yours,” Percy responds, turning to him. Percy opens the door to Tary’s bedroom and stands back from it. “I’m certain you haven’t heard it enough.”

“My loss?” Taryon says uncertainly, entering. His room looks nearly exactly the same as he left it, the day the necklace went off.

“You’re one of us, Tary,” Percy says, “you lost him just as much as we did.” Percy looks as beautiful as he always has, but so much older. More worn, somehow. His normally sharp blue eyes are gentle. Tary wonders what Percy sees when he looks at him. Does Tary look as aged as Percy and Vex'ahlia, or does he look like the same fool that cried when Vax hit him in the nose the first time? A wave of grief pulses through him and takes his breath away. 

“You’ve taken the mirror out,” Tary says, in lieu of a response.

“It’s behind the dresser,” Percy says, “we’ve taken all the mirrors down for a while. Vex kept catching herself in them, and, well.”

“There’s-you’re certain there’s no way to bring him back?” Tary says, “I’ve seen you bring him back before, there must be something, anything that can be done.”

“We’ve all been a bit mad about it,” Percy sighs, “we’re doing our best. It’s terribly complicated and nearly impossible and I’ve been researching it constantly. And I would appreciate it if you didn’t mention it to Vex’ahlia.”

“Of course not,” Tary says, “it’s just - I should have been there. I wanted to get home and start my future and you had your gnome friend back and I just thought - but it shouldn’t have mattered. I should have been with you all. My greatest friends.”

“I’m glad you weren’t, Tary,” Vex says, coming up behind Percy in the doorway.

“I am as well,” Percy says, “because being there and still being powerless to do anything was perhaps one of the worst feelings I’ve ever had, in a lifetime of terrible feelings.”

“Are you staying with us for long, Tary? We have both missed you desperately,” Vex says. Tary looks at them both, leaning into each other unconsciously, like flowers to the sun. He is struck, for perhaps the dozenth time, with the knowledge that they don’t need him. It bothers him less now than it has. Even in this time of their greatest grief, Vex and Percival don’t need anything from anyone. Vex and Percival will have each other to the ends of the earth, and Tary is happy to be with them, but for his sake, more than anything.

“Only for a little while,” Tary says, “I do have the Brigade to get back to. I may not be able to get back for a very long time, and I wanted to see you again while I could.”

“We’d love to have you any time,” Percy says.

“And I love you both,” Tary says, “more than anything.”

 

He leaves, sooner than he would like, but his book won’t write itself and the Brigade needs to see him as a strong leadership figure, so he goes. He and Vex both cry when he does. He takes a leisurely pace back, and takes the time to mourn Vax that he never had before. He mourns all of Vox Machina, because he knows that it will never be the same, and he may never see all those people together again. He hopes that he does.

When he finishes it, he sends a signed copy of his book to every member of Vox Machina, along with a headshot. He gets a note back from Vex, Keyleth, and Pike. Pike signs the note with Scanlan and Grog’s names as well. It says simply “a very interesting story, Tary!” He’s very proud of the fact that he’s left her so speechless, and makes a note to himself to include this as a blurb on the next printing. Keyleth’s is very similar, though she uses the phrase “creative liberties” and asks him to come visit when he can. The note from Vex is longer.

 

_Goldie—_

_Everyone in Whitestone absolutely adores your book. Cassandra has taken to quoting it to Percival every time she sees him, due to your enthusiastic and colorful words about him. I am, of course, flattered by your descriptions of me; I am, in fact, the most clever woman in the room, and I’ve also taken to reminding Percival of this whenever he disagrees with me. He tells me to mention that your book has made his life very difficult lately and he is very cross with you. I wish Vax could have read it, he would have either thought it was hilarious or would have killed you on the spot. I miss you terribly, darling, and I wish you would come visit us again soon. If you don’t, you shall force me to come to you, dragging three little de Rolos behind me and the bigger de Rolo in front of me. Please do come._

 

He doesn’t make it back to them as often as he would like, but he tries as much as he can. The little de Rolos call him “Uncle Goldie,” a joke that Vex’ahlia thinks is incredibly funny, and seems to amuse Percival too, no matter how much he claims otherwise. Tary retaliates by calling them all “little elf niece” and “little elf nephew.”

Taryon didn’t make it back to them as often as he would like, but Vex makes it to him, just before the end. She looks the same. She makes her apologies for Percy, who couldn’t make the long journey anymore. She doesn’t say it, but Percy is not even ten years younger than he is, and lived a much harder life than Tary has. Tary understands. He is clutching Vex’s hand when he shuts his eyes for the final time. He is clutching Vax’s when he opens them again.

“Hey, Goldie,” Vax says, with a grin.

“Little Elf Boy, it has been far too long,” Tary replies.

**Author's Note:**

> hey do you ever think about how in the timeline taryon and scanlan spent about the same time with vox machina, and that vex and percy considered taryon a closer friend than scanlan? because i think about that a lot. i hate sam riegel with my entire being for making me emotional about three different characters
> 
> anyway come join me @calebwidogasts on tumblr where I yell about character relationships at 3 in the morning


End file.
